Empowering Bytes: Protect Your Peace

Nkechi Nwafor-Robinson: 00:00:03

Great day, amazing human. Yes. Welcome to Empowered at My Skin podcast where our mission is to help 1 billion people in this world think in more empowering ways.

Empowered humans empower humans. So you are in the right place to become a lead domino for Empowerment today. My name is Nkechi Mwaho Robinson.

I'm not only your host, but I am a vibrant optimist obsessed to bring you empowering content with every single episode.

We will bring you weekly content, alternating between longer episodes with featured guests and a shorter episode called Empowering Bites, where I will be joined by my co host, Gabby Memone. So if you're ready, let the show begin. Great day, amazing humans.

Yes, I am here with the amazing Gabriella Mamone for another inspiring and short but sweet Empowering Bites episode. And so today we are going to dive into a really, really amazing topic around peace and. Oh, I just want to say that peace is not a vibe.

It is absolutely your responsibility.

Gaby Mammone: 00:01:24

Yeah, and I'll share that.

I used to be a yes person, and by doing so, I felt like I was sacrificing things that were important to me, like alone time, like, being like my peace. And it came clear to me, really, only months ago when I was speaking in a speaking competition at a location that was not even an hour from my home.

So I easily could have driven there the day of.

But I knew that if I did that and if there were traffic or the morning I was delayed, if the kids needed me or I needed to make breakfast with a family, then what would have happened is my peace wouldn't be protected. I needed to be in the right form of mind to practice what I was going to say. I needed to be alone.

And so I made the decision, which the old Gabby didn't do, to drive up the night before, stay at the hotel closest to the venue so I could be alone in the hotel, practice, have peace, wake up the next day at my leisure and not have any stresses. And I'll tell you, that made such a big difference for me when I was able to protect my peace. And so what does it mean to me? It means alignment.

It means my heart, my spirit, my choices, they were all in sync, just like a trifecta. Oh, I love that. This is a topic that we're going to talk about today and I really want to.

Nkechi Nwafor-Robinson: 00:02:58

Well, actually dived in already. Like, I think, like, as you were talking to me, that actually felt very peaceful. And so I asked, like, I'm thinking, like, that is just.

It's very transferable to, like every day Right. Like, it's like, what are the moments throughout the day that we. We protect our peace? And I.

And I think there's some overlap in the sense that we've actually had an episode on prioritizing rest. Right. Learning to work from a place of rest and not rest from work. I think it's also the same. I.

It's interesting that this is the topic that we sort of came up in the B roll. And let's just be honest, if you've watched the last. What is it? Three episodes, you'll see that we're in the same.

I'm wearing the same hair, and we're in the same office. So we batched. We batched episodes today, but so we had some really awesome B roll conversations. So earlier in this day, I was.

I was stretching, and I'm. I'm stretching very intentionally because I'm recovering. Like, I'm trying to heal my body from an injury. And.

And one of the things I recognize in my stretching was. Was my need in my life to invite more of the moments that I was having in at that time. So the. I was in the hot yoga room. The lights were off.

I had some, you know, some. The music was playing, and there was just this really sense of calm and peace, you know? And then I remember it left.

And then I recognized that it left because I had a. A thought came, and that thought brought a little bit of anxiousness, you know, and so. And so I'm sharing. I.

Like when you were talking, some of what you spoke about, went to that. Because I think we could probably find those pockets of moments every single day.

Gaby Mammone: 00:04:51

Yeah.

Nkechi Nwafor-Robinson: 00:04:52

Even if they're fleeting. Like, in that particular moment, I knew I needed it. So I brought everything down into the moment.

And then I also recognized when I left the moment because then anxious thought came, and then I was like, okay, bring yourself back into the moment. Right, Right. Because I recognize that.

Gaby Mammone: 00:05:08

Yes.

Nkechi Nwafor-Robinson: 00:05:09

So I think peace lives in the moment.

Gaby Mammone: 00:05:12

It does in the present moment.

Nkechi Nwafor-Robinson: 00:05:14

Right.

Gaby Mammone: 00:05:16

Lives in the present moment. And it's having the boundaries to understand that. So it's like, this is what I will, and this is what I won't allow. I will allow this.

I won't allow this. So it is. It is quite profound because it's peace protecting.

Nkechi Nwafor-Robinson: 00:05:31

I think we. I talked about. It's not a vibe. It's a responsibility. It's like a practice. Right. Because it is so hard to maintain it.

Gaby Mammone: 00:05:38

Yeah.

Nkechi Nwafor-Robinson: 00:05:39

Right. Because the minute so many times go.

Gaby Mammone: 00:05:42

I didn't mean to cut you off. We even had an Episode about this.

Nkechi Nwafor-Robinson: 00:05:47

In the same outfit, in the same outfits. Just say so. We had, we had that conversation today. Let's just. But at the time of this recording. But, but no, no. Go, go, go. You cut me.

I want you to go.

Gaby Mammone: 00:06:01

Thank you. What was I going to say? Oh yes. Sometimes like, think about your lives. Whoever's listening, whoever's watching. Have you ever been misaligned?

It's like you're doing something but it's not quite feeling right. Or you say yes to something but your heart's really not there, but you do it anyway. That misalignment.

If ever you say yes to a misalignment, then you're saying no to your peace. Right. So now you have to think, where are you going to put your priorities?

Nkechi Nwafor-Robinson: 00:06:31

Mm hmm.

Gaby Mammone: 00:06:33

And you know, there are people. And again, I used to be a people pleaser. And so it's not just people pleasing. Right. It's about over committing.

It's about people pleasing or staying silent when really you should be speaking up. There's nothing wrong with saying no. And you can be very polite about it. If someone wants you to go out for a drink, you don't have to justify.

So I am not able to. And that's all they need to know. There's nothing wrong with that.

Nkechi Nwafor-Robinson: 00:07:04

I think I, what I want to challenge myself is like, I think this is already really becoming a practice for me.

Gaby Mammone: 00:07:12

Oh good.

Nkechi Nwafor-Robinson: 00:07:13

I do believe that where I still have opportunity as I close my eyes and really think about this is in my conversations with others. That's really where, you know, like that's where I need to double down on the practice. Right.

Because you know, peace is hard to maintain and a lot of times it's hard to maintain because something comes into the environment and so like, let's just talk about interactions with other people. Right?

Gaby Mammone: 00:07:42

Yeah.

Nkechi Nwafor-Robinson: 00:07:42

And how can we start to condition ourselves to be more at peace in those conversations?

Because it's, it's sort of like what you said, like if you're in a conversation that's misaligned to your heart, your spirit and your choices, then it is your responsibility to protect your peace by.

Gaby Mammone: 00:08:03

Oh yes, right.

Nkechi Nwafor-Robinson: 00:08:04

It's by either not engaging.

Gaby Mammone: 00:08:07

Yeah.

Nkechi Nwafor-Robinson: 00:08:08

Because you know you're going to be misalignment, you're going to be misaligned with your heart, your spirit and your choices. Guaranteed. Right.

Gaby Mammone: 00:08:14

Yeah.

Nkechi Nwafor-Robinson: 00:08:15

And so not engaging, not taking it personal, I think that's a good way to protect your peace.

Gaby Mammone: 00:08:22

Agreed.

Nkechi Nwafor-Robinson: 00:08:22

I think setting healthy boundaries. Right. Like using your voice. I'm going to Say, using your words, because we are also. We were talking about.

At some point, we want to talk about the let them theory. Once I get through the book, we will. Because I think that there's behaviors that we either like.

I don't think protecting your piece is silent treatment. I don't think it's slamming doors. I don't think it's ignoring others. I don't think it's closing your heart. I don't think it's any of those things.

And I also don't think it's any. I don't think it's tolerating any of those things either. And so I think we can all probably be sharp as to when we're either being the one.

Like, we are the. We are the giver of those things or we are the receiver of those things. And.

Gaby Mammone: 00:09:06

Right.

Nkechi Nwafor-Robinson: 00:09:06

And then how can we. What are the. What are the sort of the peace tactics that we can employ when those.

When those surface in our lives to get ourselves back to a place of peace?

Gaby Mammone: 00:09:17

Yeah. For me, I find. And this. We're all human. Social media can really bring us down a rabbit hole.

You go on Instagram or Facebook for a reason, and then all of a sudden, you know, there's so much time that's passed because you just kind of look at things and some of it's drama, some of it's chaos, some of it's disruptive. And so is that what we want?

Do we want that to interrupt what's on our task list or that call that you're supposed to make or the taxes that you're supposed to do? Whatever that looks like. Right. So I also find, though, that there needs to be a boundary about chaos, about unfollowing it. You know, I.

There's someone in my circle that I love some qualities that this person has, but I find there's a lot of drama with this person, and it's unnecessary. And it does impact me in a way that makes me feel like we're not aligned.

And so I don't need to be looking at this person's social media because I know that that's going to impact me. That's a boundary that I have. Not necessarily remove them fully from my life, but just remove a certain thing. And I think we're allowed to do that.

I want to reclaim my peace. And to do that, I'm choosing to use my time wisely.

Nkechi Nwafor-Robinson: 00:10:37

And I think as we sort of start to close this off to what you just said about, like, online, the. The whole unfollower online Like I recognize it's part of my daily practice. Darth. Like I wake up at 4, 10 in the morning, it's very still.

I use that time to do my God.

Like God, like listen to God, like pray to God, listen to God, take in scripture, ask for the word to open up to me and for me to open up to the word, you know, so I can really receive it. I do work out my body which I, it's a, it is my, it's a happy place for me. So I do feel very much at peace.

Especially when I have the best kick ass workout. I, I take in learnings because I want to help others. So like I want to present myself in the day for teaching. Right?

Like what can I learn this morning that I can, you know, sort of share?

And I, you know, I think choosing energy exchanges wisely, which is kind of what you were touching on, which is something I was conversation I was having with a friend of mine the other day where I said there's like, like we have to be mindful. As you start to think about the things that you want to do in life, you have to think about the, the, the, the energy.

Like we are finite human beings. So where are you expending your energy?

And so if you are in conversations where after you leave the conversation you're feeling depleted and, and you don't feel elevated. I love what you. I always go back to this one. Leave people in the space of increase so you don't feel like you're left in the space of increase.

Then I would say you gotta ask yourself, are you. It's like is that an energy and exchange that you invite into your life? Too often, like how often you inviting those kind of exchanges.

Then I think there's the complete opposite, which are those relationships that when you finish with them, you're feeling like you're flying high, like you're soaring like an eagle. And it means that you just had an eagle conversation. I want to be in many of those, right.

And so our majority of my time and energy spent there because I think that that helps multiply your energy, your capacity.

Gaby Mammone: 00:12:41

Yeah, yeah.

Nkechi Nwafor-Robinson: 00:12:42

Then there's the other one which is smack dab in the middle. Neither increase nor decrease. And you know, and it depends on who those people are.

But you also have to recognize that that was energy spent and you neither gained nor lost. You know, so you just remain neutral.

You know, you kind of want to, I think you also want to evaluate how much of your lifetime you're spending in those. Because I don't think you're moving either. Right? So I think that there's that and then the other one that I think is so.

Daily practice of forgiveness. And I think we can all.

It's funny, a really, really great friend of mine locked this into my head a long time ago using a scripture from the bible which is First Corinthians 13. We often say it at weddings and this any other. And one of the lines in that scripture says like essentially means can you, like, do you burn?

Can you burn the records? Right. Like, are you holding on to things? Right. And so how many of us can. How many records do we need to burn? You know?

And what are the one, what are the records? Like, keep no record of doing, of being wronged. And how many of us are holding on to sins that are not present where we've been wronged?

And it's, it's a difference. And I think protecting your pieces.

If that wrong continues to be done, then you really have to ask yourself, why am I still connecting myself to something that's not serving me? But if you're holding on to a wrong that has not reoccurred, then that's on you. I think in both cases you need to walk away from. Right?

Gaby Mammone: 00:14:20

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And what you've just told me, told us, shared with us, is you're guarding, you're guarding your energy and you get to make that choice.

It's a, it's an investment. It's being intentional about checking everything that you're involved with.

Nkechi Nwafor-Robinson: 00:14:36

I like that piece is an investment. Yeah, it is an investment. Yeah, I think it's an investment. It's a good investment.

Gaby Mammone: 00:14:43

Treat it like it is. You get to make the choice like it's your full time job, protect it.

Nkechi Nwafor-Robinson: 00:14:47

And I don't. And I, you know, if I were to be listening to this, I'd be like, well, my life is just so full of so much stuff.

And I'm talking here and I'm doing this. And I don't think peace is the absence of noise.

Gaby Mammone: 00:14:59

Right.

Nkechi Nwafor-Robinson: 00:15:00

I think it's the ability to stay grounded even when the world gets like chaotic and this then the other. Right. Which is one of the things we talked in our B roll is like, how do you really stay grounded in a day when you're spiraling.

Gaby Mammone: 00:15:13

Yeah.

Nkechi Nwafor-Robinson: 00:15:13

And come back together. And I think that, that, I think that's where you just know that you are like killing, killing the practice of peace. Right.

Like, yeah, you're crazy right now, but I am choosing peace even in this craziness. And madness. Like I think you. I made the choice. I truly do believe it. It is. It's. When the world gets loud, peace is still possible.

Gaby Mammone: 00:15:34

Yes. Agreed. Agreed.

Nkechi Nwafor-Robinson: 00:15:37

I love it.

Gaby Mammone: 00:15:38

Love this.

Nkechi Nwafor-Robinson: 00:15:39

I love it. I am going to. I'm going to eat my.

My words and I'm going to practice peace way more and especially in interactions with others because that is where I do spend a big part of my time. And it isn't the absence of having people around. It's the ab. To be grounded even. Even when. When that is present.

Gaby Mammone: 00:16:03

I love it so much.

Nkechi Nwafor-Robinson: 00:16:04

I love you.

Gaby Mammone: 00:16:05

I love you. We said it together.

Nkechi Nwafor-Robinson: 00:16:09

And so sadly, this is where I have to say. Why do I always say sadly? Because it's not really that sadly. No, it's not sadly. I'm gonna change that. I just noticed that.

I don't know why I hear that. I heard it.

Gaby Mammone: 00:16:19

I always say it.

Nkechi Nwafor-Robinson: 00:16:20

Yeah, I do. Sadly, this is where I have to say goodbye. Oh.

Gaby Mammone: 00:16:24

As if to say, oh, it's unfortunate that we have to stop talking, but it's okay. It's great.

Nkechi Nwafor-Robinson: 00:16:28

I think it's great that we have to stop talking. I think it's great. I think it's great. Because you know why? Because it's short, it's sweet, and leaves you wanting more.

So it is great that we have to say bye. Bye. I am Ike and I'm Gabby with Wendy. And we're out. Bye.

Gaby Mammone: 00:16:45

Protect your piece.

Nkechi Nwafor-Robinson: 00:16:46

Indeed. There you have it. I trust that you are feeling more empowered in your skin. As the late Dr. Maya Angelou said, when you get, you give.

When you learn, you teach. So it would mean so much for us at Empowered on My Skin Inc.

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